If there’s one thing contemporary society could learn from Game of Thrones it’s how to worship. This society is filled with enough religion to summon and exorcise a demon simultaneously. Of course this might be due to the short life expectancy caused by disease, hunger and pubescent kings having hissy fits it’s best to hope a supernatural deity has your back. Not all gods are the same when it comes to listening to prayers though some are cool with their high priests giving birth to smoke assassins while others have the wait and see mantra as their modus operandi. So who’s the best one to follow given none wields a hammer that goes to them when willed to? Well that’s just what we’ve been trying to find out and we found.

R’hllor answers prayers but it’ll cost you.

Say what you want about the lord of Light but boy does he deliver. R’hllor raises a soldier from the dead after a 20 second prayer, that’s not faith, that’s a money back guarantee. Unfortunately praying to R’hllor is like going to the mob for a favor, they can do it but at a price. Stannis found out the hard way that while sacrificing your daughter might get you fair weather best for besieging and conquering in, it might cause your army to desert you because they just saw you sacrificing your daughter for fair weather who knows what you’d do for the win? Conclusion: best for individual practitioners in private.

The Old Gods Might Have Retired

The old gods were the gods the children of the forest recognized as supreme deities. They were the first gods worshipped in Westeros and are now worshipped by the wildlings and the Northerners such as House Stark. So far the old gods appeared to have made Bran Stark a greenseer. The ability of Wargs to possess simple minded creatures also appears to have come from the Old Gods. What do they ask in return? Well not much really, they don’t have altars with most of the worship done in private so they’re a benevolent group really like gramps who’s retired and so only comes occasionally to spoil his grand-kids. As long as a few trees have their faces carved into them they’re good to go.

The Seven in One God requires plenty of Supplication or you get death.

The Seven (Sevenism?) is the main religion of Westeros where one god is composed of seven personas making Captain Planet jealous and a fan-boy at the same time. The seven aspects that form the one god are, the father the mother, the crone, the maiden, the warrior the smith and the stranger. All are prayed to quite frequently except the stranger who’s thought to bring death so no need making him/her aware of your presence. The seven are the new god(s) in contrast to the old ones and one would expect there would be a show of force to assert their power. Unfortunately none has been shown so far making us think that maybe they/it are overrated.

The Drowned God is Kinda Content With the Iron Islands

This guy doesn’t joke around. He is the god of the Iron Islands and boy do they love him. So far we haven’t seen any shows of power from the drowned god but the ironborn like him because he’s okay with all their looting and stuff. The drowned god accepts raids and killing as a form of worship and no man is worthy of facing him until they’ve paid the iron price. All in all given we’ve yet to see any action from the drowned god yet it might be that he’s okay with the Ironborn congregation.

The Many Faced God has an Identity Crisis

The many faced god has it’s own lordly manor over at Braavos where they tend to the dead and blind vengeful teenagers. The many faced god has his people become faceless so that they can right the wrongs of society quietly. Perks of being a worshipper include learning how to kill a person with different poisons and becoming a master of disguise. Some think that the other gods are just one form of the many faced god making the worshipers hard to pin down. The assassination skills are definitely the bait but if disobedience means I’m struck blind I’m sticking with The Seven.